Tales from Temagami - Land of Deep Water

Stinker(Homo Excrementi) There was a number of people camping, and one man was camping by himself. He was a young man and he tried to get his neighbour's daughter to marry him, but she wouldn't have him, saying that he was not good enough. And so the young man went back and forth trying to get a wife. Then the people went away to another place to camp, as it was getting spring, but the young man stayed back. He was full of mite'win (conjurer's magic). He planned to have revenge upon the girl who would not have him. He collected omne excrementum quod invenire potuit and made it into the shape of a man. He was determined to settle with the girls who had refused him, for he was full of revenge. When he had made the man alive, he sent him to where the girls were camping. The new creature was frozen nice and hard, he was nice looking, and he could talk. And so Stinker came, early in the morning, crunching through the snow to where the girls were in camp. When they saw him coming, they cried, "Somebody's coming. Make a fire." And when they reached the camp every one received him in fine style, as he was such a nice fellow. "Where do you come from? Who is your father?" they asked him. "Humpback," said he. "Who is your mother" "Flat-set excrementum," answered he. But the old people did not understand him. He was unable to stay near the fire long, for fear he would melt. They wished him to stay in the camp, but he couldn't, so he hurried away. Then one of the girls who had refused the young man in marriage followed him and he led her a long chase. She began to feel it grow warmer (it was April) and soon she found one of his mittens and later his hat. At last it became so warm that she came to the place where he had melted altogether et ibi erat agger excrementi. When she examined the hat, internum ejus excrementi illitum invenit. So she went back home, saying, "Good for him, he's melted.I'm glad he is melted." She couldn't catch him anyway, so she was angry. So young girls shouldn't try always to get a nice-looking man, but take the man selected for them. The old people tell them this story for a lesson, lest they lose a good man, though not so handsome, to get a "stinker".